No where to go...

Being apart of The Music Man is quite difficult. It is a very humbling and yet terribly frustrating experience to be in the ensemble. I must say this is one of the worst musical experiences thus far in my musical career. So bad.. that i am actually contemplating on whether I can really do this in REAL LIFE...? Its just so hard. iTS SO HARD TO STICK OUT. And its hard to give 100% when you know that no one is watching.

I don't know if I'm in the right place anymore. I just feel like this is something I want to do...but I am truly physically, mentally, and emotionally..unable to do it. And I've always felt this way. And now..its just as if this year is a confirmation. I wanna cry. But I can't cause I gotta do the theory homework that i've been procrastinating for the past week. Woof. I'm doomed.